writing

pondering the pithy

Posted on by Grace Day

My neighbors are traveling – again. They have recently returned from one adventure only to embark on yet another travel adventure. I must admit – I am positively green with envy. This brings to mind the rolling stone – you know the one – the one that gathers no moss, right? Well, in this scenario, my neighbors are the rolling stones and I am the opposite of a rolling stone. I am the stationary stone. This would explain my envious green hue. Unlike my friends, the rolling stones, I have gathered plenty of moss. I am, in fact, covered in thick, green moss.

Although, if truth be told, there are plenty of times and seasons in my life, where I too, am a rolling stone. It is during these times of “rolling” that I lose my accumulated moss in the process of being no longer still, but in perpetual motion.

Still, I have to ponder the deeper question here. Is the implication of this often quoted, pithy saying that moss is a good thing or a bad thing? If the implication is that moss is a good thing, a desirable thing, then a rolling stone by virtue of its constant movement, is missing out on acquiring this valuable asset of moss. Moss does provide a warm and comforting layer of protection and adornment for the stone. So moss can be considered something good. This is one interpretation.

Or – is moss considered a burden – extra, unnecessary weight that slows the stone’s roll? Is the moss making the stone more beautiful or hiding the stone’s bare beauty? All these queries are a part of my pithy ponder.

It appears to me that to this point in my life, I have more often played the part of the stationary stone rather than the rolling stone. (must be why I have acquired so much moss) Neighbors have come and gone, friends have moved here and there, while I have been at the same address for many years. And I have the “moss” to verify my lack of “rolling” – a basement and a garage and closets full of the “moss” that accumulates with the passage of time. Are these “mossy” things that fill my home treasure or trash? That is open to interpretation.

But, fun fact. Time does have a way of turning trash into treasure. Ordinary objects become valuable antiques, sought after by collectors, when enough time has passed to turn them into rare and historical treasures. Ironically, moss is a sign that the “stone” has put down roots (so to speak) by virtue of staying in one place, even though moss itself has no roots. (moss has something called rhizoids which enable it to attach to a variety of surfaces)

Moss is a beautiful, velvety soft covering – a vibrantly colored plant that lives on every continent. That’s right. Moss grows in Antarctica and in the desert. Very versatile. So why would a stone want to cease its rolling and gather some moss? Maybe for the comfort a covering of moss provides? Perhaps for the protection or for the adornment of mosses’ emerald hues? Or could it be that the stone desires the moss that grows and flourishes with the connections that are formed, the community that arises, only when the stone stops its rolling?

But it’s hard to stop “rolling” in today’s culture. We are busy and we value busyness. So I too often keep on rolling and then wonder why I have no moss – no protective, comforting, decorative cloak and cover to keep me company. (who knew moss is a good companion?) This must be why God’s word says –

“Be still; and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.” (Psalm 46:10)

I don’t need to keep running – whether from something or in search of something. My Heavenly Father says I need only to be still. (and maybe gather some moss) He will meet me where I am. In fact, He says this –

“The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still.” (Exodus 14:14)

And He says –

“In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength, but you would have none of it.” (Isaiah 30:15)

I guess that’s right. I too often resist being still in favor of that fever pitch at which we all seem to be living life. I’m afraid to slow down and cease my incessant rolling. Why? I blame FOMO. (fear of missing out) It’s a malady of our current day culture. BUT – my Heavenly Father has something else in mind for me (and for you) –

“Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for Him; do not fret when men succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes.” (Psalm 37:7)

“Do not fret”? Why? Because God’s got a better plan for me and for you too, dear readers. God gives us a wonderful invitation, if we dare to accept it and follow where He leads –

“He makes me lie down in green pastures, He leads me beside quiet waters, He restores my soul.” (Psalm 23:2)

Doesn’t that sound inviting? A chance to stop rolling long enough to lie down and rest. I’m pretty sure there’s moss in those green pastures and moss on the stones beside those quiet waters. It is in this place of stillness that my Heavenly Father restores my soul, I receive much needed rest, and moss has a chance to grow a comforting, protective, decorative covering over my once rolling stony self.

This is an open invitation from my Heavenly Father, an invitation that I want to accept often. I never regret the time I spend in His green pastures, beside quiet waters, being still, being restored by the life-giving Presence of my Creator. I will “be still and know that He is God.” I will gladly cease my rolling and gather some moss until my Heavenly Father calls me to “roll” again, to follow Him to some new adventure.

sincerely, Grace Day

the gum giver

Posted on by Grace Day

No, that is not a job description, but it does describe a work colleague of mine. He is a substitute teacher at the large, inner city public high school where I also work as a sub. This can be a tough job, a thankless job, a position the students don’t take seriously but they do take advantage of those in this role. My colleague, however, has found a solution or at least a gimmick to enhance his standing with the students even though he’s only a substitute teacher like me. His idea? He is the giver of gum goodness.

That’s right. My colleague has discovered that giving out free chewing gum to the students is indeed a very good gimmick – a gimmick full of goodwill fueled by the goodness of gum! Who knew? It’s a simple gesture but it works wonders. I’ve seen it work. He stands in the halls during passing periods and hands out gum to anyone who asks. Even the most rude and rebellious of students will approach him politely, hand outstretched, and usually remember to say thank you at the conclusion of the gum transaction.

The teenage years are turbulent times by definition. Many students walk around angry, anxious, or on edge, just waiting for their next explosive encounter. Enter the gum giver. Instead of telling students they are in violation of dress code, to take off their hat or to get to class (that’s someone else’s job anyway, someone way above our pay grade) he offers them a choice of gum flavors – a small gift, an act of kindness and goodwill inserted into an often contentious environment.

This giving of gum changes things for the better – one stick of gum at a time – one positive interaction at a time – his gimmick of giving gum goodness reaps a harvest of goodwill. And goodwill is a scarce and valuable commodity among the teenage population, let me tell you. (maybe among the population in general now that I think about it) The gum giver is building bridges between himself and the students, slowly, steadily – each gesture of kindness, each stick of gum, another piece of the bridge he is building every day. (although I’m sure some days the chasm seems too wide to be bridged by mere sticks of gum, no matter how many he gives away)

This is not something new for him. The gum giver has been doing this for years. Students seek him out during the school day – they go out of their way to find him. Of course, they are getting free gum, but they are also getting something more – a smile, a kind word – it’s possibly the most positive interaction of their day. I think my colleague is onto something wise and profound. Although, it’s also a good survival tactic. Teenagers can be formidable adversaries. I think the gum giver is smart to put into practice this strategy –

“If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.” (Romans 12:20)

He is making a big difference with a seemingly small gesture – the giving of a single stick of gum. Living in a culture that is producing anxious, agitated, often angry individuals, what he does may seem insignificant and insufficient against such odds. BUT – we are told in Romans –

“Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.” (Romans 12:21)

In this case, the goodness of gum is the method and I think it is working. As I said previously, he has been doing this gum giveaway thing for some years, which brings to mind these words in Galatians –

“Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers.” (Galatians 6:9-10)

I wonder if the gum giver ever grows weary? Perhaps, BUT – I have never seen the gum giver give up. And he never runs out of gum either! That’s a minor miracle considering every school day he hands out hundreds of sticks of gum, one at a time, all day long. (many students are repeat receivers of his gift of gum goodness in the same day) I hope his consistent kindness and generosity are contagious. We could each take a page from the gum giver’s play book and practice some small form of “gum giving” every day.

Whether it’s the giving of a smile (there are those who find that too costly or too much trouble) or the giving of a kind word or a listening ear – I am inspired by the gum giver to try and make a difference for good in the lives of those I come in contact with every day. (maybe candy bars?) Whatever it is, dear readers, we each have our own unique contribution for good that only we can make to the world. So let’s do whatever it is, one step at a time, one day at a time, one stick of gum at a time.

And the world will be the better for it – “overcome evil with good.”

sincerely, Grace Day

fun fact – the gum giver is also the person in the post – “moment of glory”

HOA related PTSD – part two

Posted on by Grace Day

In my previous post I mentioned that I occasionally suffer from HOA inspired PTSD, usually triggered when I receive one of their “love letters” in the mail, which are always very formal and truly foreboding. My most recently received letter concerning an overgrowth of weeds in my turf, triggered memories of letters past, such as the one I received in the not so distant past (at least not distant enough to no longer be remembered) about my mailbox. Now my mailbox was and is regulation, meaning it meets HOA requirements, and was in good condition. The problem? The numbers and letters of my address on one side of the mailbox were somewhat faded by the sun and I guess this was unacceptable to my HOA.

This was a violation that needed to be corrected, hence the letter I received. I considered my options carefully. I could paint over the numbers and letters on the questionable side of the mailbox BUT what if the color didn’t match exactly the color on the other side? Would I receive another letter for noncompliance with mailbox rules? Ok, I could paint the letters and numbers on the other side of my mailbox at the same time, with the same color, so they would match, BUT what if this color didn’t match exactly the color on the mailboxes of my neighbors? Would I then get another foreboding love letter from my friendly HOA?

What to do? We are all required to purchase our mailboxes and the posts that hold them from the same vendor or company to ensure uniformity. There are no choices we have to make regarding color, shape, height of post, style of lettering and numbers, materials used, etc. There are no deviations allowed. Uniformity is key. My HOA obviously does not have a DEI officer on the board. I deduce this from the fact that there is no diversity, only uniformity when it comes to mailboxes and other rules such as no grass over four inches high, (see previous post) no dandelions etc.

Although, I must admit they are getting the equity part down pretty well. We purchase our mailboxes from the same place, getting the same thing. No upgrades or additions are allowed. All our mailboxes are the same and therefore they are all equal. No mailbox is fancier, prettier, or more interesting by virtue of being a different color or design or decorated differently so as to stand out from the other mailboxes. This effectively eliminates “mailbox envy syndrome” which, if left untreated, can lead to discord, unrest and potentially worse in the neighborhood.

So, my HOA is just looking out for me and my neighbors by eliminating sources of competition and envy among us before they can occur. I will have to find other ways of expressing my individuality, since I can’t do it through my mailbox choices. HOAs tend to favor compliance over creativity. No ostentatious yard displays of any kind permitted. Tasteful landscaping is preferred for all and HOA rules apply equally to everyone. (well, except in the case of my neighbor’s plentiful dandelions, as it appears they were not included in the “excessive weeds in turf” letters) I’m sure it was just an oversight because my HOA is nothing if not inclusive. I’m certain they did not mean to exclude my neighbors from the mailing of the “weed” letters. It was just an unfortunate oversight.

Sometimes my HOA related PTSD is worse than at other times. Usually triggered by the receipt of one of their “corrective” letters, it can then linger as I anticipate with dread when the next letter might come. It’s not good to live one’s life “waiting for the other shoe to drop” or for the next HOA letter to arrive. There’s got to be a better way or a better place. Well, maybe not in this life, but there is hope for a future free from PTSD of any kind. I read about this in Revelation where it is described in these words –

“Now the dwelling of God is with men, and He will live with them. They will be His people, and God Himself will be with them and be their God. He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” (Revelation 21:3-4)

This sounds like a place where I want to live! No HOA needed. Nothing to cause me or anyone else “mailbox envy syndrome” or any form of PTSD. The grass probably just maintains itself at the proper, approved height. No warning letters need ever be sent out to the residents who dwell with God. And I don’t have to wonder if they’ll be a place for me when I get there. I have Jesus’s promise on this. He told His disciples –

“In My Father’s house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with Me that you also may be where I am.” (John 14:2-3)

This is great news! There is a place waiting for me in eternity. I will not be alone either. Jesus said specifically, “that you may be where I am.” And you know what I think? I bet my Heavenly Father will let me decorate my place that He is preparing just for me, any way I want. It won’t have to look like my neighbors’ places. There will be no HOA in heaven! No more vaguely threatening legal letters striking fear into my heart. There will be diversity of design and of decor!

Just by looking around at the infinite varieties of flowers or of trees or of birds or of animals in general, I can know that our Creator loves diversity and creativity and individuality. And since we are created in His image, we too naturally crave creativity, individuality and the diversity that naturally results from our individual, creative pursuits. And it’s an all inclusive place that’s being prepared for you and me, dear readers. No HOA rules or regulations to exclude us from our eternal residence in our eternal neighborhood. God’s invitation is open to all!

“For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life.” (John 3:16)

The place that is being prepared for me sounds like a really great place – a place where I am included, a place where I can be myself, the person God created me to be. Actually, I’ll be the best version of myself since God’s corrective and creative work in me will be completed when I move into my new place. Paul reminded the Philippians of this in his letter when he said –

“being confident of this, that He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 1:6)

So my HOA related PTSD will no longer exist when I at last inherit and inhabit the place my Heavenly Father is preparing for me even now. I bet they don’t even have mailboxes there – no need for them. And I won’t have to worry about what will happen to me in fifteen days if my compliance with the current HOA letter’s concern is not complete. Beyond that, I truly can’t imagine just how good is the place my Heavenly Father is preparing for me, although I am given this heads up –

“No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love Him” (1 Corinthians 2:9)

I can’t wait! BUT – in the meantime, you will be relieved to know that I did purchase a new mailbox, rather than attempt painting over the address on my current, perfectly good mailbox. Hopefully, I am now in good standing with my HOA, and I pray this continues. But one never knows when the next foreboding letter informing one of gross dereliction and of the resulting dire consequences will arrive in my now HOA compliant mailbox. Soon, just going to the mailbox will trigger my PTSD. BUT I have hope. I am looking forward to the fulfillment of this promise from God –

“Behold, I will create new heavens and a new earth. The former things will not be remembered, nor will they come to mind. But be glad and rejoice forever in what I will create, for I will create Jerusalem to be a delight and its people a joy. I will rejoice over Jerusalem and take delight in My people; the sound of weeping and of crying will be heard in it no more.” (Isaiah 65:17-19)

looking forward to my new address,

sincerely, Grace Day

cyber silence

Posted on by Grace Day

I am not an AT&T customer, but recently some who do use this cell provider experienced an “interruption” in their service. This lack of connection, although not unduly lengthy, caused great concern to the many people who use this carrier and who depend on their phones daily for communication, for business, for news, for directions, diversion, entertainment and updates of all sorts. According to individuals who were affected, with whom I spoke (in person) during this “service outage”, it was not a good experience to say the least. They could not conduct business as usual, could not contact family, friends, co-workers or others they needed to speak with, couldn’t make plans or let others know of plans that had changed. The people affected by this break in their cell service talked about having feelings of isolation and of anxiety during this period when they were without cell service.

For those of us who lived most of our lives (and quite successfully I might add) in a world without cell phones, it now comes as a surprise, (or maybe shock would be a better word?) just how dependent we have become on our phones in such a short time. Today, our phones keep us continuously connected to the world around us. We no longer have to wait for the evening paper to get the day’s news. We have it instantly. Conversations that used to take place in person or not at all, now take place online via text or twitter (X) or Facebook or some other social media platform. Life is now lived in a very public cyberspace rather than in the very personal face to face.

And that’s the thing about cyberspace – it doesn’t have a face. It can’t provide the personal touch that we all long for even if we won’t admit to it. We can’t gaze into Cyberspace’s eyes. We can’t see Cyberspace smile or scowl or frown at us during our conversation. Cyberspace doesn’t give hugs or high-fives. Emojis simply do not measure up to in person interactions which are filled with human emotion. Emojis are one dimensional. We humans are multi-dimensional beings created body, mind and spirit in God’s image. Emojis don’t actually have emotions or feelings of any kind. Ironic right?

Some nameless, faceless entity in cyberspace may know all about me – may have all my personal info, but this is not the same thing as actually knowing me personally. This is not a reciprocal relationship that Cyberspace and I have. Not even close. Cyberspace may have all the “goods” on me, but I know nothing about them, probably because “they” are not a person! Therefore, “they” are not knowable. (even though “they” claim to know me) I can’t have a real relationship with Cyberspace. But many of us have settled for a life lived in the one dimensional realm of cyberspace, rather than in the very real world of face to face, person to person human relationships.

And while I’m on the subject, let me just say that not only does Cyberspace not have a face, it also doesn’t have a heart. This is why cyberspace is such a poor substitute indeed for the infinitely more satisfying face to face, real time, shared experience of spending time with other people (who do have a heart) instead of with one’s phone. Today many of us continue spending time with our phones, even while we are physically (but not mentally or emotionally) present with other people. This overly close, may I say even co-dependent, relationship many of us have with our phones, may explain the angst, the fear, the unsettled uncertainty, the anxiety and the feelings of isolation and depression many people experienced when they were without their cell service during this recent, unexplained interruption in service.

We were created for connection. We ignore this truth at our own peril. We are designed for connection with our Creator, God, and for connection with each other. It is these connections with other human beings that allow us to form the bonds of community. We were created to live in community with others, not in isolation. Maybe that’s why not having cell service, even for only part of a day, brought on such strong reactions of anxiety and fear. People felt isolated and alone. We have neglected the power of the personal for so long in favor of the cyberspace experience, that when cyberspace fails to function, we are at a loss as to how to proceed.

Many worry that there will be more interruptions of cell phone service in the future, leaving us disconnected and anxious each time. We have no control over the nameless, faceless “they” that has the power to shut down our phones, thereby disconnecting us from everyone and everything we count on to get us through our day. But in these uncertain times, I have the assurance that there is one with whom I will never lose communication – my Heavenly Father. “He will never leave me nor forsake me.” (Deuteronomy 31:8) No cell service blackout can sever this connection!

The earthly powers that be, may be able to shut off human communication systems, BUT they can do nothing to shut off or to prevent communication between myself and God nor can they interfere with communication between God and His people. That’s you and I, dear readers. (“We are His people, the sheep of His pasture.”) This truth is the hope that sustains and drives out all fear.

I don’t need working cell service in order to talk to my Heavenly Father. He is not “just a phone call away.” God is already here with me. He is omnipresent. He abides in me and I in Him.

“For in Him (God) we live and move and have our being.” (Acts 17:28)

He “knows the way that I take.” He will not lose track of me even when I get “off track” for whatever reason.

My Heavenly Father hears me. “Before a word is on my tongue, He knows it already.”

Cyberspace may go silent, but the heavens never do, nor will they ever go silent. God is always speaking. I just need to listen.

“Be still and know that I am God.” (Psalm 46:10)

even when there is cyber silence, there will never be heavenly silence –

“The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of His hands. Day after day they pour forth speech; night after night they display knowledge. There is no speech or language where their voice is not heard. Their voice goes out into all the earth, their words to the ends of the world.” (Psalm 19:1-4)

sincerely, Grace Day