my task is to create a profile for myself or rather of myself, not a visual one but a written one.  Either task to me is equally daunting.  I think I would prefer the artist’s challenge of capturing myself on canvas, although, how do they do that? There have been some self portraits by famous artists over the years, but this is to be a profile, which is different than a portrait.  Different how? you ask.  Well, a profile is a side view, a silhouette, an outline, a sketch.  It lacks the depth and dimension that a portrait would provide about its’ subject.

But you see, dear readers, I have entered the world of online dating and I am required to create a profile to post with my picture and my other information, my stats if you will.  (and I thought only athletes had stats?)  Something in me is pushing back at this routine request, actually outright rebelling would be closer to the truth.  You see, I think we are more than our resumes!

In attempting to put my life on paper, something is lost in the process.  The very words I pen in an attempt to define me, instead confine me, putting limits on who I am, as I feel compelled to stay within the lines I have drawn for myself or worse yet, to stay within the lines that others have drawn for me.  We are each so much more than simply the sum of our cumulative life experiences.  Our whole is always greater than the sum of our many parts or facets.  We are not a mathematics equation; we do not equal the sum of all our parts, we far exceed it.  This is true for each and every one of us.

We are more than a list of our likes and our dislikes.  We are more than a list of our accomplishments.  We are more than the list of our failures and our struggles as well.  (but who will include these in the profile they create?)  And so it will happen that strangers will read my words.  But will they read between the lines? Will they know the truths that lie behind the words?  Will they hear what is left unsaid?  Will they hear my heart?

We each have a story to tell.  Actually, we accumulate many stories over our life time. We weave them together into the fabric that we wear as we go through life. This fabric with which we clothe ourselves becomes our life story.  We are so much more than meets the eye.  We are more than a profile.  We are each a full-fledged portrait, meant to be beheld in person.

And that is where cyberspace falls short.  I want an in person relationship in the real world, not a cyber relationship in the on-line world.  Could the former result from the latter?  Time will tell.  Given all the problems technology and I have in getting along, it will take a miracle to make a real world connection.  I’m hanging on to my mustard seed even as I write these words.  My God says a mustard seed is all that is necessary.

Bottom line, I don’t want to know someone’s profile, I want to know them.  And I want someone to know me.

“Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face.  Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.”  (1Corinthians 13:12)

sincerely,    Grace Day

 

appearance and reality are often two very different things;  forced to choose, I choose reality every time.  why?  reality may be less pretty, more painful, less glamorous, more mundane,  but reality is always more, well, real.   let’s face it, appearance is by definition a mere “apparition” or image of something, not the thing itself.

I’d rather have nothing than have the appearance of something, while lacking the very substance of that thing I so desire, whatever it might be.   An empty reality is preferred over an abundant appearance every time.  Appearance has no ability to satisfy, to challenge or to reveal truth.  Reality reveals truth, challenges me to face that truth and grow, and therefore ultimately has the potential to satisfy. Appearance has no staying power, she is an image, an illusion, an apparition fleeting by nature.  Reality provides me the power to relate to others who dare to be real as well.

So buyer beware;  things/people are not always as they appear to be.  In fact, almost never.

“The Lord does not look at the things man looks at.  Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.”  (1 Samuel 16:7)

sincerely,         Grace Day

joy, that ever elusive, always sought after feeling or is joy even a feeling? and if not, then what is joy?  a state of being? a way of living?  I do know that she is often confused with happiness, her counterfeit cousin.  Happiness, so circumstantial, so fleeting; as fleeting as the circumstances which heralded her arrival to began with.  She never tarries long with anyone.

But joy,  she abides in unexpected places and shows herself when I am not looking for her.  When I have given up my search and seek instead others’ hurts to heal or others’ burdens to share, it is joy that keeps me company in these endeavors. Often, I am not aware of her presence.  She is quiet.  She does not announce herself nor ask that I announce or acknowledge her presence within me.  She makes herself at home and lingers long despite the storms that rage around me. They do not scare joy nor run her off.

Joy entered into our existence with the birth of Jesus.  The angel told the shepherds that very night, “Do not be afraid.  I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people.  Today . . .  a Savior has been born to you; He is Christ the Lord.”  (Luke 2:10-11)

Joy stays with me in difficulty and in grief.  She comes alive when I read God’s Word or when I obey His commands.  Joy is most visible when I bring her to others. Otherwise, she abides with me, a quiet guest, making no demands, yet filling places in me that, were they left empty, would fill with things too heavy for me to carry, crushing me beneath their weight.  Joy gives me her wings and teaches me to fly.  She never leaves me nor forsakes me because Jesus never does.  Jesus is the author of joy.  Apart from Him she does not exist.

“Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.”  (James 1:2-3)

“. . . Do not grieve, for the joy of the Lord is your strength.”  (Nehemiah 8:10)

Jeremiah said of God’s Words, “they were my joy and my heart’s delight,”  (Jer. 15:16)

Jesus told His followers, “If you obey My commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have obeyed My Father’s commands and remain in His love.  I have told you this so that My joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete.”  (John 15:10-11)

I do not need to find my way to joy, for joy has found her way to me.  She has been with me all along.  She is light in her abiding and she sheds light when my way is dark.  Thank you, God, for Your good gift of joy.

“. . . for I have redeemed you.  Sing for joy, O heavens, for the Lord has done this;”  (Isaiah 44:22-23)

sincerely,           Grace Day

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The morning moon, lies pearl white, stark and still in an ink black, predawn sky, alone now that all the stars have gone to bed.  She takes my breath away while time stands still, as still as this morning before the world awakens.  My heart aches in that moment of beholding her, pausing to rejoice at such beauty freely bestowed on any bold enough to turn their gaze from earth to heaven, if only for an instant.

It is only a moment in the slow, swift approach of the coming day that morning moon and I share.  I look away, overwhelmed, her beauty too much to fully take in a moment more.  I tell myself I will remember how it was and turn my eyes to other tasks that take my time.

When next I look for her again, the sky is now a palest blue and my morning moon, still there to keep me company, has become a paler, more translucent version of her once luminous self.  She now must share the sky with the morning sun, but still she lingers, unwilling to disappear though her allotted time is past. This ancient ritual, the changing of the guard, plays out with me as witness once again. My morning moon hangs on, deigning or daring (depending on your point of view) to share the sky a little longer with her constant rival.

Oh, morning moon!  Such beauty I cannot contain, though I long to reach out and hold her here with me, if only for a moment more.  I long to possess what cannot be possessed, perchance to purchase what is not for sale but is God’s gift to one and all.  The beauty in this still life moment, this moment that is not still at all, but oh so fleeting, eluding any grasp I would attempt, leaves me to wonder, did I see her thus at all?, when she has finally left her place and gone to grace another’s sky.

“And God said, ‘Let there be lights in the expanse of the sky to separate the day from the night, and let them serve as signs to mark seasons and days and years, and let them be lights in the expanse of the sky to give light on the earth.’  And it was so.  God made two great lights — the greater light to govern the day and the lesser light to govern the night.  He also made the stars.  God set them in the expanse of the sky to give light on the earth, to govern the day and the night, and to separate light from darkness.  And God saw that it was good.”   (Genesis 1:14-18)

sincerely,      Grace Day

 

 

now that I  “AM” my mother ( the very thing I spent my life resisting, don’t we all?) I totally “get” her and I want to tell her this.  Because now I understand and with this newfound understanding comes total and complete admiration for the woman that she was.  I want to tell her this but she is no longer here.  She is no longer here to hear my admission, my confession, my revelation.  How I long to reveal to her this newfound revelation of mine, (which has taken me quite by surprise) that we might revel in it together and share the joy of my discovery.  Yes, I am now my mother and that is not such a bad thing after all.

“Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you.”  (Exodus 20:12)

sincerely,       Grace Day

is there someone strong enough to hold my heart, gentle enough not to crush it?

well, it’s that time once again — time to welcome in a new year.  I use the word “welcome” realizing that may not be the word others would choose to use in reference to the advent of a new year beginning.  Now as I’ve said before, dear readers, I like beginnings; the beginning of almost anything.  There’s just something so hopeful about a fresh start, a clean slate, a new beginning where all things are possible and defeat and disappointment haven’t entered in yet.  It’s a pain free place where, suspended in time, we await the turning of the page on the calendar, the dropping of the ball and the striking of the clock; signaling the start of this next as yet unmarred journey full of infinite possibilities and empty for the briefest of moments of all hurt and heartache.

Then the ball drops, the clock strikes its’ final stroke, we turn the page on our calendar and . . .   and what?   What now?  we ask ourselves.  What is different than a moment ago?  “Well, that depends,”  (I answer myself, as I often do) Whether or not I get that clean slate, that fresh start really depends on me and what I decide to carry with me into this new year, into my new beginning; and what I decide to let go of and leave behind.  I get to decide, no one can decide that for me.  But what I decide will make all the difference for me in the coming year.

And in that moment, I realize why my New Year may seem anything but new as I live it out day by day.  I find that I have carried the old with me into the new; I have brought many things “old” into my “new” year, cluttering my clean slate.  It is not a new beginning at all, my clean slate isn’t really clean if I bring all my old mess with me.  In fact, my slate was never clean to begin with.

Then I remember some of my favorite words, “Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for His compassions never fail.  They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness.”  (Lamentations 3:22-23)  Every day is New Year’s Day for me, because of this promise to me from my Creator.  Because of His compassion (mercy, forgiveness, grace) to me, that I can receive new every morning, each day is truly a fresh start, a clean slate for me if I so choose.  My God stands ready and willing to make it happen each day.  All I need do is to ask Him.

Each day is full of hope and promise, of unlimited possibility.  Each day begins unmarred by yesterday’s mistakes.  Except for what I bring into it from yesterday. Now some things are worth holding onto, but others that I hold onto end up holding me back and weighing me down.  Some things, like my faith, I want to cling to, to continue to carry with me into each new beginning, be it a new day or a new year.

But other things that I continue to carry, (bad habits, unforgiveness) I need to let go of and leave behind.  I need to realize what no longer serves me well, what is no longer needed (maybe never was needed) what has become a burden and a barrier to my progress.

What to continue to carry forward?  What to let go of and leave in the past?  The trick is in figuring this out.  And each time that we do, we come closer to our clean slate, our fresh start and our Happy New Year.  I found some good advice in Philippians and in Hebrews.  “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable — if anything is excellent or praiseworthy — think about such things.  . . . And the God of peace will be with you.”

and conversely,  “let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us.  Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith,  . . . Consider Him (Jesus) . . . so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.”

Yes, if I don’t learn to let go and to throw off, my burden becomes increasingly heavy and in time, unbearable.  Now some burdens I choose myself, while others are thrust upon me through unforeseen, unplanned, uninvited circumstances that surround me against my will.  All changes are not of my choosing, but I can choose my response to each and every one of them.  And I have Someone who bears my burdens.  “Praise be to the Lord, to God our Savior, who daily bears our burdens.”  (Psalm 68:19)   that’s DAILY, not just sometimes.  how comforting and encouraging is that!?

And just as wonderful, God wants to give us rest.  We need and so we seek physical rest.  But there’s something we need even more, something better, something more important, something more lasting.  Jesus said,  “Come to Me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your SOULS.  For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.”  (Matthew 11:28-30)

Rest for my soul, rest for your soul.  Now that’s something I wish for you in the New Year, dear readers, rest for your souls.  We are a seeking, searching culture; but often we don’t realize nor do we recognize what it is that truly satisfies our souls and so we continuously search, wearing ourselves out in the process.

We continually crave that fresh start, that new beginning that will last.  And one day that will happen.  “Behold, I will create new heavens and a new earth.  The former things will not be remembered, nor will they come to mind.  But be glad and rejoice forever in what I will create,”  (Isaiah 65:17)  “Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, . . .  Now the dwelling of God is with men, and He will live with them.  They will be His people, and God Himself will be with them and be their God.  He will wipe every tear from their eyes.  There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.”  (Revelation 21:1-4)

But for now, dear readers, until that final, last new beginning, I wish you a Happy New Year.  And in wishing you a Happy New Year, dear readers, I wish for each of you a year of challenge and opportunity, a year full of meaning and purpose, a year rich in relationships, a year filled with reconciliation, with forgiveness, with second chances and happy endings.  (Hallmark style or otherwise)  Notice I didn’t say anything about money, power, privilege or promotion.  That’s because history has shown that these things don’t satisfy us nor do they sustain us.

” . . . Has not God chosen those who are poor in the eyes of the world to be rich in faith and to inherit the kingdom He promised those who love Him?”  (James 2:5)

I wish for you all God’s good gifts in the New Year and God’s gifts are always good.

“Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.”  (James 1:17)

sincerely,                    Grace Day

 

 

 

 

a silent night?  no they were wrong,  that night the universe filled with song. hallelujahs, the glad refrain, ringing loudly from every plain.

silent night?  could they not hear?  hosannas rising from every sphere;  pent up praises of all the years, spent waiting for Messiah’s birth — God had finally come to earth!

the slumbering faithful awake to rejoice, to the angel chorus adding voice; the rocks and stones begin to sing, worshiping the eternal King.

angels proclaiming, shepherds shouting, stars on fire, mankind doubting, wise men seeking, a baby crying –He would save us with His dying.

and rising putting death to shame, the eternal purpose for which He came.  to purchase sinful men for God, required He come our path to trod.

and so He left His home in glory, this then is the old, old story — which will be our new, new song;   when we join the heavenly throng

in singing as on that night of old, event the prophets long foretold

oh silent night, so filled with song, a world rejoicing that had waited long; released at the moment of Jesus’ birth, praise and worship surrounding earth

hosannas, hallelujahs too sublime for mortal ears, filling the universe with song these many years; someday we will join the throng, praising our Savior all the day long.

listen for the music, listen with your heart; in the silence hear it, of the chorus be a part.

all creation’s singing in worship, joy and praise,  celebrating in song the Ancient of Days

The music of our Creator fills all of heaven and earth, praises of the angels ringing as on the night of Jesus’ birth;

oh, silent night, so full of song — come again Lord Jesus, don’t be long.

“Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; He is Christ the Lord.”  (Luke 2:11)

“For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders.  And He will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.”  (Isaiah 9:6)

sincerely,     Grace Day

 

 

or hurtful to your heart.  How can this be?  you ask.  It would seem the opposite should be true.  After all, the girl always gets the guy; the good guy, the right guy for her.  Sure she was headed in the wrong direction when the movie started.  But she comes to realize her mistake during the drama which always ensues.  She then ditches Mr. Wrong, making her available for Mr. Right.  Or sometimes Mr. Right is involved with the wrong woman, but he always wises up before it’s too late for true love.  Oh, there are some twists and turns before everything gets straightened out, but the ending is always a happy one for all concerned.

Wish I could say the same for real life, my real life for example.  And it always hits home at Christmas time when Hallmark Christmas movies are everywhere, twenty-four-seven.  Yes, the Hallmark Christmas movie is a genre all its own.  And there are so many of them!  The settings may be different, the characters may change, the circumstances may vary, but the plots never waver.  The right people always find each other and end up together, happily ever after, if you will.  Hallmark Christmas movies are all variations of this familiar and predictable age old theme. (which is why we like them, they are comforting, they are hopeful, they are heartwarming)

Now I’m all for a little hope and comfort, but lately these movies leave my heart feeling less warm and more lonely than anything else.  I guess I’m wondering, when’s my happy ending?  I’m still waiting for the glass slipper to be found and fitted to my foot. Maybe I shouldn’t be confusing these movies with real life. Maybe movies are supposed to be a temporary escape from real life, not a beacon of false hope.  Maybe I should stop watching?  or stop comparing my life to the lives of these people whom I become so attached to as I watch them deal with their difficulties and find true love.  Maybe from watching them I should take heart, hope and inspiration.

Maybe I need to look around and realize my life is not the only life that is NOT a Hallmark movie.  Holidays are hard for anyone living with loss, recent or otherwise.  (I still miss my mom holiday or no holiday)  But holidays are memories and that could be why loss is felt more deeply at this time than at others.  Maybe I should stop blaming Hallmark Christmas movies for my sad state (hence the hazardous to my health)  Love is not absent just because it doesn’t manifest in movie format.

The saying that Love was born at Christmastime is literally true.  God’s love for me and for you, a love that shares my pain and pays my price, wrapped in blankets and lying in a manger, entered earth’s history with Jesus’ birth.  “Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.”  (John 15:13)  And that’s just what Jesus came to do and did.  He left His pain free life in glory to walk miles in our pain filled shoes on our oh so broken roads.  Now that’s true love!  It may not look like a Hallmark movie but it’s REAL.  I don’t know about you, but given the choice, I’ll take reality over fantasy any day.  It may not be as pretty but it’s ultimately more satisfying and more lasting.

I think I’ll seek out the widow, the shut in, the alone and the lonely this Christmas. God’s true love is meant to be shared with others.  Together we’ll make our own version of a Hallmark Christmas movie.  So, Merry Christmas to all!

sincerely,       Grace Day

“But the angel said to them, ‘Do not be afraid.  I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people.  Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; He is Christ the Lord.  This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger’.”  (Luke 2:10-12)

 

 

 

 

 

 

four hundred years of silence, broken by a baby’s cry;  a Deliverer for all people after so many years gone by.

God’s promise fulfilled, just as His Word had said– now the Living Word lying in a manger bed

heralds hope for all who hear, bringing His peace, God again draws near; to show His love that we might believe, the baby’s healing we’ve longed to receive.

God’s voice once again is heard, walking among us– the Living Word.  Hope renewed, redemption at hand,  God has come for every man.

that first night as the Baby slept, heaven rejoiced at the promise kept, while knowing the Messiah would later bleed, the only One who could fill our need

for a Savior to pay our price and He had come to sacrifice, to reconcile and make me right, this is the hope born Christmas night.

This Living hope abides with us now, waiting for every knee to bow, at Jesus’ name and then we’ll see– this world as it was meant to be.

Peace is coming as Jesus planned, when the dwelling of God will be with man. Come again Lord Jesus, we’re waiting still,  knowing Your promise You will fulfill.

Our hope You delivered that first Christmas night, we wait on You to make all things right.  for now we remember, we rejoice, we praise — trusting in Your perfect ways.

I thank You, God, for this gift you gave; long awaited Messiah come to save, me and all who would believe;  Your perfect pardon to receive.

oh let me remember and share the shepards’ joy,  may I be filled again with thankfulness and wonder at the birth of this baby boy.

“Therefore the Lord Himself will give you a sign:  The virgin will be with child and will give birth to a son, and will call Him Immanuel.”  (Isaiah 7:14)

“The Word became flesh and made His dwelling among us.  We have seen His glory, the glory of the One and Only, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth.”  (John 1:14)

sincerely,      Grace Day