A friend just recently adopted another dog, giving her current dog a playmate and companion to keep her company while my friend is at work. Another friend is currently fostering two dogs after the recent death of her long time dog. And another friend currently has three dogs as she recently adopted one more. Why do I bring this up? These women are all single, due to death or divorce, so they live alone. However, their reputations remain untarnished no matter the number of their dogs because, as far as I know, “crazy dog lady” is not a thing.

But if my friends were currently collecting cats instead of dogs, they would all be called “crazy cat ladies.” Right? Now if they were married or children still lived at home, then “crazy cat lady” wouldn’t apply. Or if said women had cats but also had a dog or dogs, then the “crazy cat lady” label isn’t applied. Why is this so? Who makes these rules anyway? Apparently, for single women, dog ownership is socially acceptable, even cool, but cat ownership will get you labeled as weird, eccentric, or worse.

And what about horses? If a woman has horses that’s not a problem, no stigma associated with horses. No “crazy horse woman” category exists. In fact, being a “horse woman” sounds aristocratic, athletic, noble and even exciting. So what about single men who might have a cat or cats? I don’t hear people whispering about “crazy cat men.” Seems like men get a pass and are exempt from this label. That hardly seems fair.

Then there’s fish. Fish seem to be a safe choice for pet owners of both sexes. You can have as many fish as you want and no one calls you crazy. You are considered a collector, especially if they are rare tropical fish that you are acquiring. Even pet ownership of hamsters, guinea pigs or lizards doesn’t seem to carry with it the stigma that cat ownership carries with it for single women. Some would say the same for those who have snakes as pets but here I beg to differ. I think anyone who has a snake or snakes as pets is “a crazy snake person” be they male or female, whether they live alone or in a house full of people – I am willing to apply the “crazy snake person” label. (I apologize if that’s not very inclusive)

So who’s getting a bad rap here? cats or single women? or both? Labels, like “crazy cat lady,” whether deserved or undeserved, can be so confining and misleading too. These labels once acquired, tend to stick to us just like those name tags they give you at meetings and gatherings of all kinds. Sometimes you just want to peel the label off and start fresh. You don’t want people defining you by your past nor by your current circumstances. Sure you share a house with multiple cats, but there’s so much more to you than that.

I think perhaps this is how the woman at the well must have felt. We read her story in John chapter four. Even though we don’t know her name, we know quite a bit about her. She was a Samaritan woman from the town of Sychar. Jesus and His disciples were traveling through Samaria and stopped there for rest. Jesus waited by the well while His disciples went into the town to buy food. It was the middle of the day, so no one was there until a Samaritan woman came to draw water. This was unusual because all the women came to the well early in the morning when it was still cool and again in the evening when the midday heat had passed.

But here she was in the middle of the day when she knew she would be alone. She wanted to be alone because she knew how the people in her town viewed her. She definitely felt defined by her past and labeled by her current circumstances. Her solace was in isolation. That way she didn’t have to face the daily pain of open ridicule and rejection, the constant hurt of being judged or maybe more likely misjudged.

But Jesus was different. As the Samaritan woman approached the well, I’m sure she was surprised to find that she was not alone. No one ever came to the well at this time. And the stranger was a man and a Jew! She must have been shocked to find herself alone with such a person. But before she could retreat, Jesus said to her, ” ‘Will you give me a drink?’ The Samaritan woman said to him, ‘You are a Jew and I am a Samaritan woman. How can you ask me for a drink?’ (For Jews do not associate with Samaritans.)”

“Jesus answered her, ‘If you knew the gift of God and who it is that asks you for a drink, you would have asked him and he would have given you living water.’ ”

The woman questioned Jesus as to how and where He would get this water because she saw He had nothing with which to draw water from the well. She didn’t know who Jesus was, but Jesus knew all about her, including her past and her present circumstances. When she asked Him for the living water He spoke about, Jesus asked her to go get her husband, to which she replied,

” ‘I have no husband,’ she replied. Jesus said to her, ‘You are right when you say you have no husband. The fact is, you have had five husbands, and the man you now have is not your husband. What you have just said is quite true.’ ”

It’s not surprising that this woman felt defined by her past and labeled by her current situation of living with a man not her husband. Everyone else judged her, but Jesus offered her something else – living water – forgiveness, acceptance, restoration. Jesus offered to her what she needed most – Himself. We read as their conversation continues –

“The woman said, ‘I know that Messiah’ (called Christ) ‘is coming. When He comes, He will explain everything to us.’ Then Jesus declared, ‘I who speak to you am He.’ ”

Jesus revealed Himself to her! The woman at the well’s response?

“Then, leaving her water jar, the woman went back to the town and said to the people, ‘Come, see a man who told me everything I ever did. Could this be the Christ?’ They came out of the town and made their way toward Him.”

Jesus was fully aware of this woman’s past and of her present situation. Still, Jesus knew that neither of these things defined who she truly was. She was more than “the crazy husband lady” who had a whole collection of husbands in her past. She was more than a Samaritan, who Jews refused to associate with at that time in history. However, even though Jesus was a Jew, He recognized her infinite worth, He saw who she was in God’s eyes, not man’s blind vision of who they believed her to be.

And so the story of the woman at the well unfolds into this unlikely ending. Remember, she had returned to town to tell the people that she had met the Messiah.

“Many of the Samaritans from that town believed in Him (Jesus) because of the woman’s testimony, ‘He told me everything I ever did.’ So when the Samaritans came to Him, they urged Him to stay with them, and He stayed two days. And because of His words many more became believers. They said to the woman, ‘We no longer believe just because of what you said; now we have heard for ourselves, and we know that this man really is the Savior of the world.’ ”

The woman at the well was now welcome in her town, where before she had been an outcast. After her conversation with Jesus, she didn’t keep the good news to herself about where to find the living water, she shared it immediately with the very people who had shamed her and shunned her for so long. How could she do this so generously? Perhaps because she was now forgiven, accepted and set free, she was able to forgive those who had caused her so much pain. She invited them to experience the healing and joy that she herself had just experienced.

Jesus knew the Samaritan woman’s label, but He saw through it to the person He had created her to be. And she fulfilled that purpose for which He had created her, when she boldly shared what had been so generously given to her, when Jesus met her personally, one on one, right where she was and revealed Himself to her. She believed Him and it changed her life forever.

We are more than our labels, dear readers. Don’t allow the culture to define you – your Creator has already done that.

“For we are God’s workmanship/masterpieces, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.” (Ephesians 2:10)

sincerely, Grace Day